Saturday, May 12, 2012

Get away from that internet I'm cutting it down

Man, I love the Google "auto complete" feature. I typed in "get away fro" and today's title was one of the listed results. Sounds a little like the old "don't make me turn this car around" empty threat.

We all know the Internet is like a Hydra, if you cut it down three more grow back in its place, so obviously this is an empty threat as well.

When I was in high school, I was rather obnoxious (as most of us probably are/were), and tended toward speaking/shouting/acting/spazzing before thinking. The other day a memory occurred to me, and I held onto it to share with you. Sometimes, I'm really, really lucky that things turn out as they do, because my big ol' mouth has a lot of Trouble Potential.

It was a summer evening, and I had gone to a local mall with a friend of mine. It's an old, rather decrepit mall, and the parking lines are less than fresh. We'd finished our shopping, and were coming out of the doors, when in the twilight, I spot a man leaning over my car.

My. Car.

Oh no way. You don't mess with my car. That's just how it is, and even in high school I was a big Mama Bear about it. I took about three seconds to grab my friend, swear rather quietly, and run like the wind to fend this man off my car.

Now, my eyes aren't all that great. Even now, I remember not being able to see him in focus at all, and I FLEW over there ready to brawl rather than have my baby broken into. As I approach, I shouted something about "what do you think you're doing with my car?"

Somewhere before this point, most people's common sense would kick in and say...I'd rather have my car broken into than potentially be, oh I don't know..shot. Which is highly likely in this scenario for me, but I didn't think, I simply reacted.

After I shout, I slow down, because the man had noticed me, and was turning around. He was also wearing a uniform with a badge.

*cue ominous music*

Turned out, I'd parked where there wasn't really a parking spot (thanks barely there painted lines...couldn't see you!), and as we chatted, I calmed down, and he let me off. Thank goodness, I really could have gotten myself and my friend in quite a situation if he'd been some unruly thief or something.

Sometimes my instincts take over everything, and I dive headfirst into the shallow end. From what I understand in various talks with my dad, this is a genetic trait, and how we redheads of the family learn best.