Road trip - from the road

This is my first road trip and I have to say, I think I've caught the bug. I adore travel and it's so fun to be the "pilot" of our trip. I'm loving all the sightseeing and really enjoying my family time in the car :)

Blitz, of sewing proportions

This weekend has been a whirlwind of thread, whirring machines, snipping, fabric and ironing!! TONS of it, so much so that at the end of last night, I simply spaced on the proper proportions for a Little Bean I was making, and the poor thing...well...

Let's just say that one will be in the Bargain Beans when the shop opens back up. It's functional, but it's sad, and doesn't look like a Little Bean at all! :) Today I worked on a few more bags, and my mojo really seems to have walked out the door. I have a handful that have turned out the way I wanted, but others that are being tossed into a "misfit" pile, because they simply aren't working for me.

So, I gave myself permission to take a break, took an hour long bath, and am now blogging from bed at 8:15 at night.

I FEEL SO GUILTY ABOUT THIS

There are plenty of things left to do, but I was just wasting time, fabric, etc trying to accomplish them today. That was made clear to me by the resulting bags!!

Do you ever feel weighed down by your to-do list? Guilty because you pause to do something that's not on the list? The few times I don't feel guilty are when I'm snuggling Little M, and even then, if I glimpse the sewing station....well my mind starts jumping to the thoughts of what I could be doing with that time to make it productive. It's like my mind doesn't want to believe that spending time with my daughter, the most important thing I could ever do, is productive.

Sometimes this broken brain of mine really gets on my nerves, and then I have to go take a bath to make it shut up. *grin*

Sew my word!

I have to get a picture of this for you guys....
I've said it here before, and I'll say it again:

I adore my husband

Not only is he the wonderful things I've mentioned before...he's now my Meanbean assistant!! This super secret sewing project is huge, and I'm nearing the deadline and sorta in a really big way freaking out. So far it's only been me doing all the work, and I thought I had all this time...which I DID. I don't anymore, and now I've got more to do than I should, because I love to procrastinate.

Enter Designer Hubby, aka the perfectionist. He's also a quick study, and less than 20 minutes after learning the basics of not only doing the step I needed him to help out with, but learning to sew AT ALL (he's only done hand sewing before this), he went to town.

We now have a fun, easy workflow going between us, and he's like a machine!! Last night I had to do some other things around the house that had to be done that night, and little M was extra needy for whatever reason. After dinner, with nary a word, Matt totally sat down and pumped out the rest of the bags from the stack we'd had sitting out. They're not DONE, but that step is done. This. is. huge.

Stay tuned, all will be revealed in due time :)

Back to Blogging, Day 2

The girls over at SITS are getting us back into blogging, as the kids are getting back into school! It's a fun project, and each day we basically have an assignment to help spur us on. Today's task? Revisit an old post that we want more people to read.

I looked back in my posts for a bit, and finally landed on "Oh dear, sorry about that" for a couple of reasons.

1) I have amazing friends
2) I cannot possibly be the only person who this has happened to!

Please, go read it and tell me I'm not alone, or that you'd be friends with me in spite of my faux pas :)

Please visit the fabulous SITS sponsors! Standards of Excellence, beautiful home appliances, Westar Kitchen and Bath, I got lost in the slideshow on the opening page..., and Florida Builder Appliances, the site alone makes me want to move to the hot, hot Florida state just to have a place like that!

Mini Photo Essay

Friday evening, my girl Ester invited me to join her for a cousin's wedding on Sunday. It promised to be a fun min-road trip, some girl time, and we'd get to experience something neither of us ever had - a pagan wedding. In short, it was beautiful, my time with Ester was amazing, and I wish we had the opportunity to spend more time together. <3



Set in Priest Park Rose Garden, in Olympia, WA - we were awed by the beauty surrounding us, and the sun shone down on us the entire time.



A little candid shot I took while we were chatting with some of the guests. Ester's just squinting in the sun, I think this was one of 3 seconds when she wasn't smiling that day :)



It was a fairly intimate wedding, maybe about 40 people or so there, and it felt very nice to not just be a face in a crowd.



It was a beautiful ceremony, complete with a handfasting ceremony, which to that point I'd only read about. They did things a little differently than most handfastings I've read about, where they used already prepared ropes for the binding, rather than going around to the guests and having THEM bind them. With the girl in fairy wings throwing rose petals, the guests blessing the wedding rings and the ceremonial binding, it was unusual for me, and beautiful to watch.

On our way home, we stopped and stretched our legs a bit at the Centralia Outlet Mall, checking out Coach, etc. Turns out, Coach isn't my style (or Ester's), and even at outlet prices, we couldn't touch those bags with our wallets!

But, predictably, we ended up at Claire's, and of course found some baubles we just couldn't live without. I am now the proud owner of two Alice in Wonderland styled journals, with artwork that reflects the artwork from the classic book. I want to find the perfect use for them, and I think one might end up as a Quote Book (filled with quotes, verses and phrases that move me), but I don't know about the second one.

Warning: Mini-rant ahead

As I've mentioned what I did over the weekend to people, I've had some very interesting reactions. While America is overall a country where religious freedom is trumpeted from the rooftops, for many people this seems to only include the "major" religions of the world. Even some of those come under fire (Islam, for example), and most religious views that are socially acceptable seem to either be of a heavily Christian bent, or completely Atheist. Those who choose to worship differently, such as Pagans, Wiccans, etc, are often misunderstood and met with, at best, disdain. More often, they're met with direct hostility, and because of this, can be made to feel they can't openly talk about their beliefs as a form of self-protection.

I personally am a Christian, and while I don't agree with many other belief systems out there, I also don't agree that basing how I treat someone on their beliefs is fair, or right. One of my best friends is very strongly against formal religion of any kind, and if she HAD to be labeled, would probably consider herself Atheist. My other best friend is exploring all sorts of avenues, and is currently leaning a lot toward the Buddhist end of the spectrum. This doesn't change how I feel about either girl, how I treat them, what I say to them, or how much I love them. I don't think it should with anyone else, regardless of your relationship to them.

How do you feel about the less mainstream beliefs you've encountered? Have those experiences changed your perspective?

Peer Pressure

Sometimes, wanting to "be like others" can work in one's favor. When you're trying to instill good habits in your child, it can help to point out what their friends are doing. When you want to lose weight, it can help to look around at others who have succeeded, who are currently working toward it, and who live it day to day.

While I was in Belarus, I have to admit that I felt fat, frumpy and almost matronly compared to the women my age there. Nearly everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, is thin, beautiful and fashionable. It was as I imagine going to Paris would be, except that every single person was beyond kind to me. I spent a vast amount of my time observing the lifestyle the women live, and I noticed some serious common thread. Easy, simple things to incorporate into my life, that result in being happier with one's appearance.

Most of the women I was around don't eat after a certain time in the evening. They savor the foods they do eat, and eat slowly. They allow themselves to indulge, and balance it with tons of veggies and fruits. Minsk, the city I was in, is built for walking literally EVERYWHERE. Unfortunately, the city I call home is not made for this outside of the heart/downtown area. However, I am working to incorporate more walking into my life, and I have a lovely workout partner who lives 2 blocks away. She has the same goals as I do, and she's a fabulous motivation for me to get out there and work it.

Something else I noticed, while the people in Belarus may not live in the excess that we do in America (to some degree, I think this is better, but that has more to do with my views on waste/greed than anything), they make the absolute most of the things they do have. Belorussians buy things based on quality, not quantity. A girl may only own three outfits, but you'd better believe those outfits are STUNNING on her, and she has 4 or 5 accessories that dress up all three outfits. Her shoes are to die for, and on a daily basis, her skin, makeup, hair and nails look amazing.

Driving down the street in Minsk, you'd think all the popular/pretty/love to hate her/incredible girls in the world have landed in one place, and are all out shopping. It was a lot of fun to people watch, and I felt like I learned a lot about myself.

I always told myself I wouldn't be that wife/mom who let herself go after a certain point. Unfortunately, to some degree, I have. When I dolled up a bit last Friday, put on mile high heels and a dress and felt amazing...I suddenly received an INCREDIBLE amount of attention. Ladies at the grocery store stopped me to compliment me, men were openly staring, and the guys at work were very complimentary. This did worlds for my self-esteem, and has motivated me to not only keep up the effort in daily dressing, but to work harder toward my goals of weight loss/fitness.

I'm trying to think of a certain goal to have for myself, and what reward I want to work toward. I haven't decided yet, but I'm sure at least the reward will involve a tattoo!

Vocabulary Lessons

I started this entry to come talk about how I"m about to be gone for a while, how excited I am, and how I should be working right now to finish things up before I go.

So, I opened m-w.com (Mirriam-Webster Dictionary's site) to find some alternate words for "excited" that might convey the vibrating feeling inside me a bit more clearly. The home page always has something interesting, but today's really caught my eye, and I need to share it before we move onto my original topic.

Retrosexual

Definition:a man who adopts a traditional masculine style in dress and mannersExample: "Think of him as the anti-metrosexual, the opposite of that guy who emerged in the 1990s in all his pedicured, moussed-up, skinny-jeans glory. That man-boy was searching for his inner girl, it was argued. The retrosexual, however, wants to put the man back into manhood." — Lini S. Kadaba, Philadelphia Inquirer, Apr. 7, 2010 Submitted by: West4th, NY Editor's Note: Retrosexual is a word that has been used in two very different ways. It sometimes describes an old-fashioned "manly man" – e.g. a beer and football-loving guy who cares little for his appearance. But it has also been used, as in the example above, to describe someone who self-consciously adopts traditional masculine styles – e.g. old-fashioned manners and clothes typical of the early 1960s (think Mad Men).

This is a new word to me, and one that I love. I don't know anyone who I would consider as someone who falls into this category (of traditional male styles, not the beer jerk guy), but I know men who, given the option between retro and metro, would choose retro in a heartbeat.

I leave the country tomorrow. TOMORROW people. Excited doesn't cover it.

Entry Word: excited

Function: adjective

Meaning: 1 being in a state of increased activity or agitation <excited trading on the stock exchange followed in the wake of the favorable economic report> — see feverish 1
2 showing urgent desire or interest <everyone was excited about the upcoming family vacation at the ski resort> — see eager

Feverish? While I don't have a fever, I AM highly agitated, but in the best way possible.

Have you ever been so on edge, anticipating something SO MUCH, that it feels like you're literally vibrating inside your skin? Like you have to jump around, skip, run, do anything to keep from being still because your skin might actually decide it doesn't like the motion sickness you're giving it, and leave on vacation?

 

No?

 

Figures...I'm just odd in yet another way. I have no IDEA how I'm going to be able to bear sitting on the airplane for 10 hours, but I'll do my best not to drive my dad crazy. Sorry dad, in advance.

 

Entry Word: feverish

Function: adjective

Meaning: 1 being in a state of increased activity or agitation <scary stories that were the product of a feverishimagination>

Synonyms agitated, excited, frenzied, heated, hectic, overactive, overwrought

Related Words ardent, burning, fervent, fiery, impassioned; high-strung, jittery, jumpy, nervous

Phrases keyed up

In learning the meaning and synonyms for "feverish", I'm thinking this is the ideal word to describe what I'm feeling today.

 

Jittery, jumpy, high-strung and keyed up....Hi there, it's me again.

 

To add to my excitement, a package arrived for me yesterday, which included this lovely dress!! It was an absolute steal, it looks fabulous on (and will look more so when the pounds start dropping off), and it's comfy. What more can a girl want?

I've finally found a work out partner, someone who lives near me (2 blocks!) and her kids and my kiddo love hanging out. We've been on two "power walks" so far, this last one including about 500 yards of lunges...holy cow. We've agreed to get in shape together, and she's a great partner for this stuff: encouraging, motivated and able to work with my insane schedule. Thanks Lisa for doing this with me! :)

I'm going to sign off now, as my To-Do list that's hanging near me is taunting me, saying I'll never get it all done.

 

Wordless Wednesday

Oops

I have random, weird oral food allergies. I specify oral, because these are not the "I get hives if I eat this" sort of allergies...I have a serious anaphylactic reaction that starts in my mouth within 5 minutes of eating it, and if I don't stop eating the item and take an anti-histamine, I'll end up in the ER.

I've been vigilant over the years since discovering these allergies, but every once in a while I let down my guard. Friday was one such day...I tried a "donut nectarine", which was fabulously sweet. Unfortunately for me, the only thing I can assume is that they are a hybrid of nectarines and a fruit I'm allergic to.

After popping a Benadryl, I sat and did my best to work and not panic while I waited for the pill to take effect. 

About 45 minutes later, having forgotten that I took the pill (yes, I have that kind of memory) I couldn't figure out why on earth I was barely awake. This was not the Monday "I had a killer weekend and barely drug myself out of bed and now I'm here at work" barely awake. This was the drug-induced "I took 5 painkillers instead of 1" barely awake. Complete with spinny brain, no focus, and a leaden feeling in my legs.

Dudes, I only took ONE pill...what on earth? But, I hadn't had much to eat, aside from the half of a nectarine, and so it was very potent. Fortunately that was near lunchtime, so I jumped in my car and dashed through McDonald's before heading back to work. McD's is roughly 1.3 minutes from my office, so once I was back in the parking lot, I turned off the engine, took off my hoodie, leaned my seat alllll the way back, and, get this:

I took a nap.

You guys, it was killer. I set the alarm on my cell phone so I'd be back inside on time, and just put the hood of my hoodie over my eyes, using the rest of it as a pillow. It was so comfy, the car was warm because it was a warm day (but not super hot yet), and I wished I could have slept longer.

I worked for another 3 hours or so, and didn't ever really escape the haze from the Benadryl. After taking off to pick up Little M, we went home, I turned on the TV, put my pillow on the couch, and

took ANOTHER nap.

I was woken up for dinner, then we went to the craft store (I never say no to that!), then I came home and took a lounging, long hot bath. With lots of bubbles. And a good book.

Then I came over here to my bed and picked up my laptop.

I have been a lump today, all because of my efforts to eat healthy.

I want to teach you

Friday, we went up the mountain to see Grandma K, and had ourselves a little adventure!

Our grandma is moving out of her retirement facility and into a lovely "apartment" in one of her kids' homes. It should be a wonderful change for her, she'll be with family, and her little dog will have a big playmate (they have a big Lab), and a yard to play in. We're very happy for her, because while she was happy at the care facility, it's just not the same as being with family.

Yesterday we went out to see her, as it was her last night staying there, and she has some china that she's giving to my in-laws. Little M ADORES Grandma K's little dog, Heidi, and was terribly excited to go see them again. The facility is a warm, friendly place, and Little M is allowed to "walk" the dog in the hallways mostly unsupervised.

As she's doing this, we're standing around in Grandma K's little apartment, chatting while the china is packed up. Little M comes in again, and asks if she can go into someone's "house"/apartment who invited her. She didn't know the person's name, so I went with her, because THAT is not an unsupervised activity.

Turned out to be Grandma K's neighbor, a dear little woman named Rosa. Rosa is from Puerto Rico, and just a dear. She invited both of us into her apartment, and showed me her grandson, and the lovely crochet items she makes. Rosa held up a beautiful crocheted baby blanket she'd made for her grandson, who was born in November, and I noticed she'd also made a lampshade (very delicate and frilly), a doily and a table cover. There were at least two afghans draped on her couch, and I'm willing to bet she gave away a lot more that we didn't see.

As Little M and I are appreciating these items, she then turns to Little M and asks if she likes to make things. Of course, crafty little diva says yes! Rosa, in her adorable broken English, tells Little M "I want to teach you crochet, do you want to learn?"

We sat with Rosa for nearly an hour, as Little M patiently watched and learned the basics of crochet. Rosa was gentle, patient and had her hands on top of Little M's hands to guide them. It was so sweet, and a memory I will cherish. As we bid her good evening, she gave Little M the yarn and hook she'd been working with, so she can practice.

When we returned to Grandma K's place, she asked who it had been, etc. As I told her, Grandma's eye became huge saucers. Apparently, Rosa is very solitary, doesn't talk much, and often eats alone, etc. She's embarrassed because she doesn't feel that she speaks English very well. When we were there, Rosa was able to communicate easily, and while it wasn't perfect English, it was just fine. As I told Grandma K, Rosa understands and speaks a lot more than she thinks she can, and I hope that perhaps the time spent with her might give her the confidence to spend a little more time with some of the people she shares a building with.

Little M came away from the lesson a little frustrated as she had trouble understanding Rosa, but still REALLY wants to learn crochet. We had a mini lesson on the way home, and will continue to work on it as long as she's interested.

My little beans, has an older person ever taken you under their wing?

Psst!

Ahem..

Progress! :)

5 Things Thursday

List 5 things you like/love about yourself. It can be cheesy and superficial (I love my sexy eyes), it can be deep and thoughtful (I love the compassion within me), or any mix of them. So many of us women have serious self-esteem issues. Think about it, if a stranger came up to you right now and said “quick! 5 things that make you awesome!?” What would you say?

The sad thing is, many women and girls would struggle to come up with just one reason they’re amazing. They don’t realize that just being themselves makes them incredible, unique and beautiful.

Today's 5 things...

1. I'm not afraid to wear crazy clothes
2. I carry burdens for my friends as much as I can
3. My hair makes me feel like Jessica Rabbit
4. I can figure out how to make just about anything I want
5. I have a tattoo, with more to come

Now, little beans, what makes YOU so incredible?

Hi!

Hihihihihihihihihihihihihiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!

You guys!

I"m getting ready to leave the country for Belarus y'all!! I might be a tad manic right now..my anxiety is on high alert, I just got to have lunch with my girl Ester, and I've been reading the most hilarious blog ever invented in the history of history.

In that vein, she inspired me. I've been reading through all the back posts, because context just doesn't even matter when you're as funny as Allie is. One of her old posts is about Googling herself to see what's up, and using Urban Dictionary. I've used that on my name, and it's crazy! SEE?

• One of the coolest people you will ever meet. She is always there when you need her. She likes to kiss her guy friends. She got that cashflow. Drives a silver mustang, and dont take *#@^ from no one. (I don't kiss my guy friends. Love you guys but...no. That mustang better be a 64 1/2 or I'm not driving it.)
• The most loving, beautiful, caring and amzing girlfriend.
  You're best friend. (I've left the spelling/grammatical errors as they are on the site, because if Urban Dictionary doesn't bother to fix them, why should I?)
• Wondeful in millions of ways. There are no words that describe the sheer radiance of this beautiful creature. Wise beyond her years she can tap into nature and reveal all of its secrets with nothing more than a smile. An angel in disguise she is free-spirited and fun loving. Recognized as one of the most sensual and erotic lovers. One could only wish to tame this wild temptress. Graced by god.
  "ohhhhh Kristin.... OOOOhhhhhhh Kristin!!!!!!" (kapow! this is now my bio in every online site that allows me to create one)
• a language used by someone who wants sex, used to turn people on.
  "i wanted to bone her, so i talked kristin." (I had no idea that I, amazing as I am, had become a language. Thus begins my plot to overthrow Hollywood with MY version of sexyawesomegoodness.)
• Sexy B*tch and a sex goddess, no one can ever imagine...
  "Wow...now she is a kristin!" (While I've been called one of these things, I'm guessing people can imagine..at least SOME can. *wink*)
• A brown skinned urban goddess. Intelligent, Beautiful, and Interesting, Kristin can be a man's upbringing as well as his downfall.
  "He thought no one to be as beautiful as Kristin." (It's because no one CAN be as beautiful as me...EVER. Even though this guy is clearly not talking about my pasty self.)
• A beautiful girl who is a bit shy & likes to wear puffy shirts.
  Known for making killer strudels and sarcastic remarks.
  "Damn that strudel was tasty"
  "Must have been a Kristin strudel" (This is funny. I totally wore puffy shirts back in the day, way before I ever watched Seinfeld! I'm also a bit shy (I'm getting better, I promise!), I've never made strudel but it would probably kill you because I suck at food stuffs, AND MY WIT IS SHARP LIKE A RAZOR SO WATCH YASELF FOO.)

But, Allie doesn't simply go to Google.com and punch in her first name.

No, she puts in "Allie looks like" and sees what comes up. COULD YOU BE MORE BRILLIANT ALLIE?

So, I decided it's time for me to do the same.

Here's what I found!!! (sorry, no awesome screenshots, my computer won't do them. *pouts*)

• Kristin looks like hell on the airplane...it's morning. Will and Kristin in row 14 en route to Orlando ...holla! Kristin looks like hell on the airplane...it's morning. Kristin on the airplane ... (I fully expect to look like hell on the airplane. Who DOESN'T?)
• Kristen looks just like a cross between Chyna and TA2 Maria! Gawd, that's one of the worst If They Mated scenarios. ... (So, between a misspelled country and a lady with a random acronym in front of her name...)
• Kristin looks like she just dumped a bottle of shoe polish on her head ... (oh dear, sorry about that guys.)
• Kristin looks like an exact mixture of Sarah Jessica Parker ... (this had an interesting link, where I discover another blogger did the same thing 4 years ago...)
• Kristen Looks Like Michael Jackson (I am rather pasty...)
• smart.: Kristin C. looks like a hooker Jun 9, 2006 ... No, she looks like someone who threw a pair of shorts and coverup overtop a bathing suit to run out and grab a drink. I do it all the time. (Sometimes I look like a hooker, but I don't do shorts, ever.)
• Kristen looks like Joan Jett. (OMG I wish)

(PS - I have no idea why this list is randomly spaced. I think WP knows bout my OCD issues and decided that it was going to laugh in my face, spraying spittle on my cheeks as it makes my brain go broken trying to fix it. 

UPDATE: it's only randomly spaced on the backend. When it's published it's fine. Thanks WP...just..thanks.)

That's the end of the interesting ones. Most are about Kristen Stewart or other actresses who stole my name.  I have no witty wrap up for all this...I"m at work, going stir crazy because I"m not home to be getting ready for my BIG TRIP ACROSS THE WORLD.

You guuuyyyysss!! I leave in EIGHT FRIGGIN DAYS.

5 Things Thursday

Ok, trying yet another "feature" - 5 Things Thursday. For this, the rules are simple. List 5 things you like/love about yourself. It can be cheesy and superficial (I love my sexy eyes), it can be deep and thoughtful (I love the compassion within me), or any mix of them. So many of us women have serious self-esteem issues. Think about it, if a stranger came up to you right now and said "quick! 3 things that make you awesome!?" What would you say?
The sad thing is, many women and girls would struggle to come up with just one reason they're amazing. They don't realize that just being themselves makes them incredible, unique and beautiful.
My 5 things:

1. I love my natural red hair - I didn't when I was a kid, but as an adult, being a redhead is pretty wicked.
2. I love the tears that well up for me when I see something especially sentimental, sweet and touching. I don't like others to see it (a weakness that I'm working on), but I love that something can touch me so deeply.
3. I like that I'm empathetic, and can tune in rather sharply to others' emotions. I don't always like it, but overall I think it can be a wonderful thing to allow me to see how I can help the person I'm with.
4. I love that my family loves me just as I am
5. I love that I can be wacky and stupid silly with the people I love - and while they laugh, they join me.

Now, little beans, what makes YOU so incredible?

Society's contradictions

Yesterday's post on motivation has me thinking. One of the things "Confessions of a Lipstick Queen" emphasizes is that your motivation is just that, YOURS. You don't have to admit to others what motivates you, you just have to admit it yourself.

For a lot of us, the motive behind starting a business, developing an idea, etc, is money. Money may not be the singular motive for doing so, but money is often a large, looming factor. Our society (in the US) has a very contradictory view of such things. Movies, TV and media in general villanizes (is that a word? it is now) those who are motivated by money, and portrays them as being so greedy they will do anything that will move more money into their possession. People who motivated to this extent are the vast minority, and yet due to this overarching portrayal, we as a people are ashamed if money is part of the impetus behind an action.

At the same time, money, fame and notority are all glamourized by those same media outlets, making us all wish we had hundred dollar bills to throw at shoes we sort of like. We're told that we should want to be like celebreties, athletes and socialites who have thousands at thier disposal on a daily basis, and yet we should be ashamed of ourselves for trying to make more money land in our pockets.
what's wrong with this picture?

In considering my motivation with pursuing Meanbean, I know and can accept that money is a factor. I also know that while it sounds nice to be rolling in the dough, that's not my ultimate goal.

My motivating factors:

• working for myself 100%
• setting my own schedule
• being able to be home for my kiddo when we need, not just when I can get off work
• creative freedom
• making a name for myself in the handbag world

All of these involve money in some way, but for me, it's a by-product. Don't get me wrong, I love to see the money coming in just as much as the next person! I'm just seeing that I'm not motivated by money alone- I'm motivated by the enjoyment I squeeze out of creating things, the time spent with my family while I work, and the happiness of my customers when they receive their Meanbean and send me squealing messages of "OMG I LOVE IT"

Many of my goals are outward focused, and I'm ok with that. Even if society isn't.

What are your goals, my little beans?

Introspective Writing

Lately, I've been turning a lot of thought inward. Often, I find myself daydreaming, and my dreams seem to involve doing things for others, and enjoying their happiness as I help them. But, through talking to others, learning about vegetarianism via my girl Ester, and reading some interesting books I've come across, I find myself questioning my motivation, my intent, and my goals.

I'm reading a book that was highly reccomended by a blogger I came across, and I am fascinated by it. Titled "Confessions of a Lipstick Queen", this book is written by a woman with no business education, no MBA, no work background to build on...who went on to literally have her own lipstick empire. Coming away from just a few pages, the fires of inspiration are warming my belly. She's written her "manual" in a conversational manner, and it is NOT your run of the mill "how to start a business" manifesto that so many churn out in droves.

Rather, this book helps you to be introspective, to sit with your idea(s), to keep your motivation up when you start feeling down (it's bound to happen), and more. Not only that, but the book has lessons/exercises in it that are generic enough to work for any idea (product, business, etc), and are small, fun and little ways to dream more about your idea.

I've been working through this, and it is so much fun. It's helped to spark some great ideas for Meanbean, to remind me of how big my dream is, and to keep me motivated to work toward that dream's realization.

My little beans, what motivates you?

Shopping Saturday - Betsey Johnson

Oh man, I adore Betsey Johnson! Her style is so outrageous and funky and amazing..and full of COLOR!! I come across her bags at Ross pretty often, but I'm often not taken enough to buy one. But, then later I regret it, and of course it's never there when I go back!
But, here are a few of my picks from Betsey's amazing collection of awesomeness.

YUM fluffy dresses!

Shopping Saturday - Irregular Choice

I came across this amazing site, that has expensive, funky, AWESOME items, called Irregular Choice. The internet has made window shopping a pasttime that could rival just about anything, I swear. So...in no particular order of adoration, I present to you, the items I would love to own!

Looooove thier shoes. and OMG the bag!!!

Dancing in the moonlight

Sewing is one of those things that I find incredibly relaxing, freeing, and rewarding. Yet, somehow I manage to forget that it makes me feel that way when I haven't done it for a while. With the big Super Secret Project (SSP), I have been doing a ton of prep work, and no actual sewing.

Last night I got the bug, and after knocking out some more SSP Prep Work, I got out the machine. I've had some curtains in the queue for a while that I'm working on for my grandma, and I've REALLY taken my time with them. to the point that it's been about a year since I started, and there's really no excuse for that except that sometimes I get lazy!

After a few false starts with extension cords not wanting to work with my sewing machine, we were in business! Working out in the living room is really nice when doing something large scale, because I have a lot more room, and I can be with my family while I work. I was able to knock out one more large curtain panel, and just have two smaller ones left, that I should be able to do tonight. She's so excited that they're finally getting done!!

My hope is to begin alternating the SSP work with Etsy shop work, so I can start providing you all with cuteness and storage again. I have some ideas brewing for some new products, and hope to introduce them sometime in early 2011.

Thank you all for your support, your patronage, and your lovely comments here on the blog. I love hearing from you!

Healing Ink

I tend to be fascinated with things that don't interest others, or that might gross another person out.

I'm often the one picking up stranded worms on the sidewalks after rainstorms, trying to figure out how exactly going in through a vein in a leg during surgery gets the doctors up to the heart and able to manipulate things, etc. How It's Made - the TV show on Discovery Channel? I LIVE for the marathons...yet they simply whet my appetite, because they're often having to gloss over trade secrets. Still, it is SO interesting to learn about all the work that goes into the things we encounter in our everyday lives.

Such as skin. I doubt i'll ever see a How It's Made on skin, since we have yet to replicate the amazing process of skin creation and renewal. Yet, with the advent of my first tattoo, so began my interest in what my body would do with this new traumatic experience.

Hence, I bring you, the Evolution of the Tattoo:

Day 1 - a little red, but mostly just burning like fire

Day 2 - a little more clear, still feels like fire

Day 3

a little closer - this is the way I see it, as it faces outward - see how it looks raised? Those are the scabs that tell me it's healing properly

Day 6 - I missed some days in there, but you didn't miss much in the way of healing progress

Day 7 - for the squeamish, look away now, and DON'T click to make it bigger...

Day 7 detail - this sucker peeled like a champion - and looked hecka nasty the whole time

Day 8 - still peeling, but most of the peeling is done

Detail - the finer scabs are now starting to come up, the smooth shiny layer underneath is the healed tattoo

Day 9 - the only peeling is some very light scabs on the shading on the banner, I can finally wear long sleeves again. Stupid Oregon weather thinks it's still supposed to be cold.

I'm still babying it, washing it gently in the mornings/shower, and lotion once a day. I'll probably continue to do so until I run out of the lotion she gave me, just to be sure. This healed so incredibly well, and so beautifully...*happy sigh*

I leave you with a random artsy photo of my ink and my yarn...together in bliss.

Shopping Saturday

New feature! I love window shopping, both online and in real life. So, I'll just share some of my favorite finds with you. Today is a dreamy look at splurges I'd love to indulge in.
A little window shopping has told me, I would own the following items:

Click to enjoy them bigger!

Top left: Badgley Mischka Platinum Label red silk charmeuse one shoulder dress, $404.45 on Bluefly.com
Top right: Tadashi Shoji bronze shutter pleated rosette detail gown, $244.80 on Bluefly.com
Bottom: Robert Rodriguez Black Label black silk 'Veronica' one shoulder tie detail gown, $730.99 on Bluefly.com

HOT

Guess By Marciano slingbacks $65.97

Love <3

Guess Danya Small Tote $118.00
Stop Staring Cotton Candy dress $94.95 at Daddy O's
Stop Staring Green Cocktail Swing Dress $99.95 at Daddy O's
Stop Staring 40's Two Tone Dress $84.95 at Daddy O's

5 Reasons I'm Pretty Cool

One of the tasks on my 101 in 1001 is to come up with 5 good points about me. Most of us are our own worst critics, so I figure this can be a good reminder that I am actually pretty great, and that while I screw up, I'm still awesome.

1. I have ninja knitting skills
2. I have a sharp wit
3. I can be a good mom, when I pay attention
4. I'm a great listener
5. I have spectacular taste (see: Hubby, Ester, and various awesomeness in my life)

That was actually difficult...you'd think finding 5 reasons that make you cool wouldn't be all that hard...is this a sign that I am, in fact, not ACTUALLY cool?